• Why do you think people sometimes don?t tell the truth?
  
  ?Yes, often it is because they don?t want to get in trouble or because they don?t want somebody to get mad at them or be disappointed in them. We all want people to love us. It sounds like that is what happens with us sometimes, too . . . So, we sometimes try to hide what happened so we don?t get in trouble and so they don?t get mad or disappointed.?
   
• But what happens when people find out we lied?
  
  ?Yes, that?s right. They get even madder and more disappointed, and we get in even more trouble. And although adults may not look so clever sometimes, usually they can figure out the truth fairly well! And if we lie once, they may not trust us to tell the truth another time.?  Ask:
  
• Do we want people to trust us? 
  
  ?It?s important to tell the truth so that our relationship has trust. When there?s lots of truth in the relationship, we feel safe and very loved. But, it sometimes takes courage to tell the truth when, for instance, something goes wrong, or when we did something we weren?t supposed to do, or when we didn?t do something we were supposed to do. But let?s see if we can practise telling the truth all morning.? Check in with the children at lunch and ask them to continue practising the rest of the day. Positively reinforce their efforts. If a child looks like he or she is not going to tell the truth, use the reminder, ?One minute of courage . . .?

Invite the children to draw a picture or write a story about their own experiences. They could also make up simple poems about honesty. For example:

I am honest,
I am true.
When I?m not,
I am blue.

The following are the Honesty Points in Living Values Activities for Children Ages 3-7. These are used to explain honesty to children of this young age.

• Honesty is telling what really happened.
• Honesty is telling the truth.
• When I feel honest, I feel clear inside.
• When I am honest, I can learn and help others learn to be giving.

• Always keep your promises. When you say ?yes,? stick to it; and when you say ?no,? stick to that, too.
   
• Think about the following Parenting Skill: Think Before Saying No. 
  
  Sometimes we say ?no? quickly. We are busy and don?t want to be bothered. But frequently the parent feels guilty later on when the child continues to want to do it, and it seems like it would be fine at that later time. When the child asks to do it again and the parent gives in, the child has learned that asking repetitively works. Some ask 40 times before the exasperated parent gives in! Think before you say no. Would it be good for the child? Can you take a few minutes now? For example, it may take two minutes longer to let the child stir the batter if he or she wants to do that, but it helps the child develop age-appropriate skills, he or she feels proud of the accomplishment, and a feeling of cooperative helping grows. If you do not have the time now, and you would like to say ?yes? to the child?s request, think about when you would have time. Can you do it in 30 minutes? If your answer is ?no?, stick to it. Children listen well to parents who say what they mean, stick to what they say, and do what they say. Keep your promises.
   
• Tell your children the truth. Make it simple and kind, but let them know what is happening when there are changes about which they need to know.
   
• When appropriate, let your children know you appreciate their honesty.
   
• When you detect that a very young child is telling you less than the truth, gently tell him or her that this is not story time or pretend time, you want to know what really happened. ?Please tell me again, step by step, what happened.? For very little ones, only question once, and then let it go.
   
• If a child older than 4 years has been caught telling lies, do not question her or him about the events. That may have the negative consequence of increasing the lies. Try to figure out what happened without questioning him or her, and then say, ?_________ happened, and so your consequence is _______.? Provide a small, logical consequence. Then, on another day, ask this child to tell you about something you know happened, and praise his or her honesty. Say: ?You told me what really happened. That was honesty. I like that.? 
   
• Tell your children stories about the courage to be honest as part of your bedtime ritual.
   
• Think before you say ?yes? or ?no,? and stick to it. Set boundaries for their behaviour and keep to them. Be consistent.